Sunday, April 20, 2008

What I've Learned About Myself in the Few Days

Reformed cougar?
I think not. No, I'm not old enough to be a cougar, but nonetheless I'm perpetually single for a reason. After the last few single years of what I consider 'dating like a man', I thought maybe I'd give it up.

Remember that Sex in the City episode where Carrie decides to 'date like a man'? She eventually finds out that it can be pretty lonely. But Samantha...she is the epitome of cougar-dom, and VERY happy with her life.

ANYWAY, I felt like, why not give one of them a chance? Let's go on a date! Yea....well I remembered why I am perpetually single after a few dates. So let's recap some of the obvious problems. Maybe reading this will keep YOU from making these mistakes.

1. COMPLIMENT YOUR DATE. This is #1 for a reason. She spent an hour, maybe 2, getting ready. She looks fabulous. And you don't say even the ol' run of the mill "you look nice tonight"?

2. DO NOT TALK DOWN TO HER. She knows what she is doing. She is successful. She is fabulous. She has goals, and is working towards them without a man, so why does she need a lecture on how to reach them?

3. DO NOT TURN INTO A CREEPER. Lay off the aggressive behavior. If she wants to give you a nice kiss at the end, than leave it at that. Even if she doesn't, leave it at that. Getting pushy means you will NEVER get another date, and possibly will get a restraining order.

4. BRING FLOWERS, BRING WINE, BRING A DAMN LOLLIPOP...JUST BRING SOMETHING! It's easy to pick up some flowers. Seriously. But I'd rather receive something interesting...put a little thought into it. I bring something for my's just common sense.

5. HAVE A CAR. Or borrow one, or steal one for all I care. No bicycles or crotch rockets.

6. AND LASTLY, DON'T PULL THE 'I'D LOVE TO SEE YOUR APARTMENT', OR 'I'D LOVE TO MEET YOUR CATS' LINE AT THE END OF THE DATE. It sounds so stupid, and puts the girl in a very awkward position. How can she say no when you've already parked the car with the assumption that you ARE going upstairs for the night. And seriously, just don't assume anything.

Did I miss anything? Well, nobody wants to teach their date how to be respectful. I'd just rather get out of there...good riddance! So my conclusion is that in this day and age of waning respect, just take cues from the olden days where you BOTH learn to be chivalrous and polite.

As for me? I'm back to my old self again until someone sweeps me off my feet. I miss the days of little presents left in my door, weird dates and interesting conversations. Oh yea, and a fabulous dresser, stylish hair, and is self-supported. ;)


Anonymous said...

Hey there, I know that this post is from a little while ago, but I 100% agree with your sentiments here and believe that keeping to these standards is essential for one's self esteem.
Respect ^//(*u*)\\^ from the Land of Oz (Australia) ^v^ ^v^ ^v^
Viva Las Muertas!!